Personalize-then-Store: Benchmarking and Learning Personalized Memory for Long-horizon Agents

Long-term memory systems allow LLM agents to preserve information beyond a single context window, but most systems focus on storing and retrieving facts after extraction, leaving the write decision under-specified. What deserves memory can depend on the user's current task, topic, activity, or interaction partner, while uniform extraction applies one notion of importance across these different situations. We formulate this challenge as preference-conditioned write control and introduce AdaMem, which uses adaptive natural-language Memory Policies to personalize what an agent writes to memory. Each policy represents the user's memory preference for a particular interaction context, is updated from periodic feedback, and controls subsequent memory writing. We evaluate this loop in AdaMem-Bench, which assigns different memory preferences to six concurrent interaction personas across five ten-week stories. Across two extraction models and two feedback modes, AdaMem improves average QA accuracy over Mem0 from 80.0% to 84.35% while reducing persistent memory by 9.27%. Our analyses show that explicit feedback helps models learn better memory policies, but current models still struggle to translate those policies into reliably selective writing behavior. AdaMem thus demonstrates the promise of adaptive write control while exposing policy execution as a central limitation of current memory agents. Our code is publicly available: https://github.com/galaxyChen/AdaMem

LLM agents increasingly act as personal assistants that must remember a user's profile over months: who they are (attributes), what they routinely do (habits), and what they prefer (preferences), and keep it updated as jobs, routines, and tastes drift. Existing benchmarks evaluate this "memory" ability through short, simplified interactions, missing three core properties of real behavior: the profile is heterogeneous, with attributes, habits, and preferences evolving on different timelines; changes are driven by external context such as seasons and life events; and evidence is rarely stated explicitly, instead scattered across many small actions in different apps that a memory system must infer from. We introduce DynamicMem, a synthetic benchmark that constructs 15 months of activity per user, providing long-term multi-app data that real users' privacy keeps out of reach. It provides user-consistent trajectories averaging 2.2M tokens and 1,772 grounded events per user across 16 applications such as e-commerce, fitness, and social platforms. The profile evolves over this period and is never given explicitly: each attribute, habit, or preference must be inferred from small signals scattered across apps. We evaluate at five quarterly checkpoints to track how systems scale as history grows. Benchmarking five representative systems exposes problems a single accuracy score hides: (i) profile reconstruction degrades with history length while service-task accuracy stays flat, despite both drawing on the same memory; (ii) no system both keeps facts that stay true and replaces facts that change, with errors clustering on preferences and on naming the exact referent; and (iii) over 93% of failures trace to what the memory retrieves, not to the model writing the answer, so the largest room for improvement lies in memory itself. Code: https://wenyaxie023.github.io/DynamicMem/

Personalizing large language models (LLMs) requires encoding long-term, user-specific behavioral patterns in a way that is computationally efficient, scalable, and compatible with a frozen base model. We present Latent Personal Memory (LPM), a scalable framework that represents user-specific history as a compact, persistent matrix of N latent slots, that are interpretable. A shared cross-attention projection network maps these slots into dynamic, input-conditioned soft prompts that are prepended to the input of a frozen LLM. We evaluate LPM on PersonaMem v1 and LoCOMO benchmarks across Qwen3-1.7B, 4B, and 8B backbones. Results demonstrate that LPM outperforms LoRA and Prompt Tuning by up to 8.8% and 54.4% in overall accuracy respectively on PersonaMem v1, while reducing KV-cache usage by over 64x. On LoCoMo, LPM matches LoRA accuracy with 120x fewer trainable parameters. We also show that the efficiency of LPM grows with context length and outperforms full-context at 128K context length.