We present the Wristband Gaussian Loss, a deterministic batch loss for Gaussianizing point embeddings without sampling, KL terms, or iterative transport. Each
x∈Rd is mapped to a direction
u=x/∥x∥ and a CDF-transformed radius
t=Fχd2(∥x∥2) on the wristband
Sd−1×[0,1]. We prove (and machine-verify in Lean~4) that for
d≥2 the pushforward wristband map equals
σd−1⊗Unif[0,1] iff the source is
N(0,Id), and that the Neumann-reflected wristband repulsion energy is uniquely minimized at the uniform target. We compute this reflected-kernel objective in two ways: a nearest three-image pairwise truncation at
O(N2d), and a spectral Neumann path joining angular and radial Mercer modes (spherical-harmonic and cosine) at
O(NdK), with empirically matched gradients. A 1D Wasserstein radial term and a moment penalty serve as finite-sample accelerators with the same optimum, and Monte-Carlo null calibration turns the components into a single standardized statistic. We evaluate direct point-cloud Gaussianization with a calibrated barycentric
W2 score: a deterministic Gaussian reference batch is built by recursive Hungarian averaging, with each method reported as a
z-score against same-size Gaussian batches. On the axis-uniform X benchmark, Wristband is competitive in 2D and gives the best 10D score. On a harder radial--angular-copula impostor whose Gaussian radial and angular marginals are correct but dependent, Wristband gives the best 10D and 128D scores. Coupled with learnable-key Euclidean attention and exact invertible flows, the resulting Deterministic Gaussian Autoencoder delivers a Gaussian-latent interface for counterfactual sampling with independent factors and a context/residual construction for dependent factors.
Mikhail Parakhin, André M. Carvalho, Patrick Haluptzok